Damn The Carnations

"Sammie Mays is a Category 5 literary hurricane. Here's a full-force gale of stories about the adventures that earned her the nickname 'The Gonz' and a place as the honorary mayor of Key West. 'Damn the Carnations' has the added attraction of making you reconsider your approach to toilet flushing. The book is full of piss, vinegar, wisdom and advice for living the good life." -WILLIAM McKEEN, Professor & Chair, Boston University, Dept. of JournalismExciting. Humorous. Entertaining. Embark on a road-worthy journey inside the mind of an other-worldly journalist tripping unpredictably from one adventure to another. There is no rhyme or reason, no alarm clocks, no deadlines, no code of ethics. More importantly there is no going back. So why not just relax, sit back, and allow the potion to have its intended effect. And remember: the stories you are about to read is what happens when the Universe discovers your chosen destination and decides it's time to refold the map. Trip Advisory: If at any point during the trip road conditions become too hazardous and you find yourself dreaming of a hot meal and a nice safe warm bed, keep focused on the horizon and underneath your breath just keep repeating, over and over again: "Damn The Carnations Full Speed Ahead!"
About the Author: Sammie Mays (Born: December 7, 1957) is an American author, journalist and humorist. In 1990, where many attempted and failed, Mays infiltrated prison confines, securing the interview and infamous photograph of baseball's original bad boy, Pete Rose, - while successfully evading maximum measures. As a result of her unique (and quite unorthodox) style, the National Enquirer tabloid newspaper published what became known as the $100,000 Best of Year story and photograph - and garnered Mays a "Best of Year" home run in Sports Illustrated magazine. It was then, among newsroom peers, that Sammie's atypical style earned her the nickname the "Gonz." Incensed by the fragile state and precipitous decline of a struggling pod of three-hundred critically endangered Alaskan Cook Inlet Beluga whales, Mays wrote (under the nom de plume Mayor Gonzo Mays) the popular holiday family storybook 'Pirate Night Before Christmas' in an effort to draw attention to the plight of the waning white whales. Mays grew up in the small seaport town of Pass Christian, Mississippi - The Pass for short as it's bordered on three sides by water. The third child of five, the author was born into a southern moonshine dynasty which operated across the southeast by the family's elder patriarch, the town's chief-of-police. Despite the on-again off-again Catholic school upbringing, the middle child, often overlooked by the family's political schedule (at age twelve) began smoking cigars, skipping school, hanging out in the town's local taverns and shooting pool while honing the skill of listening-in on conversations between lawmen, New Orleans Sicilian Mafiosos and the good ole boy network - developing into a young rebel and learning much in the way of southern politics, moonshine and murder. A published writer and columnist since 1986, Mays' stories and exploits have appeared in: People Magazine, Sports Illustrated, Los Angeles Times, National Enquirer, Chicago Tribune, USA Today, Washington Post, Time Magazine, Miami Herald, Key West TravelHost Magazine, and produced as vignettes for Comcast Tourist Television. During the economic recession, when newspapers began folding and downsizing, Sammie Mays jumped into the authors' pool after her satirical columns in several South Florida newspapers were replaced by suicide prevention ads. 'Damn The Carnations: Full Speed Ahead' is Sammie Mays' most recent title. The book is a memoir of shorts intended to have you laughing in the face of adversity.