It has been said many times that everything happens for a reason. Perhaps that is true. One thing is certain, without question, wherever you are in your life, in your career, in romance, you are there because of all the prior experiences and events in your life. They have brought you to where you are today, good, or bad. Some events are linear. You get a job at a company. You work hard. You do your best. You advance, you get promoted. Perhaps you become an American success story. Those things happened to me, and I am eager to tell you all about them. I never wondered how I became famous in my industry. The progression is linear and quite clear. I don't think that I made all the right decisions, but they were all mine. I blame no one for my mistakes but I also do not share my success with anyone. My wife Janet has been a pillar of strength and support for nearly twenty-five years. I share the fruits of my successes with her, but I live and die by my own doing. When I made mistakes, I learned from them.

As I look back at my life, I am fully aware that perhaps three-quarters of my life is in the rearview mirror. I do think about the path not taken. I think about the things that I could have done but did not do, and never will. Perhaps some would say that it's never too late. But indeed, it is for some things.

Everything that happens is a learning experience. Sometimes you learn that you'll never do that again, or that you'll do it a thousand more times. At times you learn that you need to become better at doing it. But it is always important to reflect.
Some lessons are easy. I was in an elegant restaurant in the Tokyo Prince Hotel in 2001. I was with a life-long friend. I don't remember ordering; how we ordered or what we ordered, but the food kept coming and I kept eating what was put in front of me. Using my chopsticks, I grabbed a mound of pale green stuff and popped it into my mouth. It looked good. But we all know that looks can be deceiving. I had no idea what wasabi was before that day, but I learned about one second later. My friend Steve was laughing hysterically while my entire head burst into flames. That was an easy lesson to learn. Unfortunately, most of life's lessons are not that easy to learn. Many are complex events, life-changing events. Death. Illness. Sadness. Joyful things, too.
What you are about to read is a brief runup of the first sixty-four and a half years of my life followed by a deep analysis of the catastrophic few months that followed. So life-changing were these several months, that it would be easy for anyone to give up hope. I was lucky. I had some setbacks a few years earlier and because of that I had a confidant - a physician - that put me on medication. I never believed in that sort of therapy all that much, but I felt differently soon after. Being already under a doctor's care was critical. Because of this, I was already a clear thinker, level-headed and even-tempered. I say this to you upfront for an important reason. When I first sought help to sort out my problems, I thought that those problems were big problems. I had no idea what was in store for me.

I don't think that anyone could say that they would be mentally and emotionally prepared for what fate had in store for me, but I was not suicidal. But I was angry. I was angry because I was dealt a hand that I didn't want to play.
Tough luck. I had already anted up.
This is a story about perseverance and faith. This is my story.