The Realities of Human Trafficking

In 2013 just before I retired, was when I first heard of the words Human Trafficking (HT) and I knew right away I was a victim. I heard it first on the news and I leaped out of my chair when I heard them say that laws were changing to protect women like me. I wanted my story to be told. But I didn't think that was possible because, for one thing, my memory failed me, and I tried hard to forget those 18 years of being trafficked and drug addicted. The traumas kept coming back, and it was too painful to try to put them into words. So without the words and with a bad memory how can I tell my story?Then one day, I realized that most of my life is recorded in public records. So I decided to go back to those painful memories. I did a lot of research and I kept a journal, trying to make sense of my life. Soon after I started my search, I was appointed by the governor to serve on the Michigan Human Trafficking Health Advisory Board. Here I learned a lot more about HT and myself. Shortly after that, I became a client of the Human Trafficking Law Clinic at the University of Michigan. They helped me retrieve even more records. As I searched through those records, I felt the fear and the terror as if it was happening all over again, and I knew I couldn't go down this dark path alone. So I signed up for advocacy services at the YWCA and I had a wonderful therapist who walked alongside me on this journey. She allowed me to unload it all on her and it was her calming presence that helped me persevere to the end. After a couple of years I was finally able to put my life story into words. Eventually, those words became a book. You know what happened next? My mind stopped spinning. This kind of reflection is so healing. I cannot say enough about it. After the last chapter of my book was written, I was able to, step back, take a look at my life, from the outside looking in this time, and I had a burst of gratefulness that I had survived it all. Victims of human trafficking are subjected to ongoing trauma and they have such a hard time embracing their survival because they get stuck focusing only on the traumas. So they try to forget it and bury it, but the traumas keep coming back to them, in unexpected ways that the victim may not even be aware of. Doing this inner work, allowed me to change the way my story ends. You know what Maya Angelou says? She says, "There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you." This is one reason why I tell my story. At any given moment, we all have the power to say, "This is not going to be how my story ends." Another reason I tell my story is that stories connect us; they inspire us, they teach us. I learned a lot and I was inspired by hearing other survivor stories. Reflecting back on our lives we discover what pulled us through the hard times. Everyone has a story to tell. Many of us reach a point in our lives when we know that we've learned a thing or two and its hard to be quiet about it. Abuse is passed on from generation to generation and I believe its all because of shame. Instead of passing our shame on to the next generation, we can pass our life lessons on and break the cycle of abuse; and this vicious cycle of shame. We are living in a strong shaming culture. . Someone has to step up to break this cycle. Let that someone be me. Let that someone be YOU. Even though it's hard to do, reflecting back on our darkest moments enables us all to pass our life lessons on to the next generation. And the more survivors we can empower to tell their stories, the more perpetrators will be sent running.By telling my story, I'm is doing my part.