My quick and easy formula for becoming the parent and person you want to be is in the first step of my book; 3 Steps to Success in Parenting and in Life. The book also gives parents the tools needed to raise children who are successful, responsible and happy. It will eliminate power struggles and relieve stress. It is parenting by design so that both parents and children can enjoy the journey. Parents will learn a procedure designed to correct mistakes in a positive way and in the process they teach their children to correct their own mistakes. This is the positive correction procedure taught in the third step. It is a problem-solving model called Mr. A. J. Dap. It is powerful. Parents and children will learn the power that comes from taking responsibility. "When you solve a problem for a child, you help him through his day. When you teach a child to solve his own problems, you help him through his life. When you teach a child to Take Responsibility, you give him power to control his destiny."* - Quote from the book. When these strategies are used parents and their children are on the same team. There is no need for yelling and telling children what to do. Both parents and children have identified goals and are working toward them so there is no need for teen age rebellion. Parent's window of opportunity is about 18 years, the first 18 years of a child's life. In that time, using the art of parenting, children can grow from dependent babies to independent adults. If parents are too permissive this will not happen because the children are raising themselves. If parents are too controlling children will grow to resent it and rebel against the parent and the parent's authority. They will act like teen agers. When children make mistakes many parents yell at them and tell them what to do or what not to do. These parents do this to correct their children's misbehaviors. My studies indicate that this is ineffective. Often the sentence they use will star
About the Author: Derold "De" Bates is an educator who has unique insights into effective human relations skills. Being raised in a blended family of 17 children gave him many opportunities to study parent to child and child to child interactions. Formal training: BS, University of Utah; MS, University of Utah; ED.S, Idaho State University. He was an Elementary School teacher for 10 years in Magna, Utah, and an Elementary School Principal 26 years In Pocatello, Idaho. He taught in Qingdao University in Qingdao, China, and at Erdem Hotlogch College in Darkhan, Mongolia. Books he has written include: Discipline Made Easy and Keys to Success, for schools. And for parents, How to be a Parent in 3 Easy Steps. His popular presentations to the National Elementary School Principal's Conventions, include "Discipline Made Easy," "How to get Parents to do Their Jobs," and Handling Hostile Humans." He has taught discipline and parenting seminars in many of the Western United States and in Canada. He has taught Successful Parenting classes more than 10 years. He and his wife, Nyla have raised four children.